[2000-10-10] deHTLMifierad They Might Be Giants: Severe Tire Damage [COOK CD 156] (c)1998 TMB Productions/Cooking Vinyl 1. Doctor Worm 2. Severe Tire Damage Theme 3. They Got Lost 4. Why Does the Sun Shine? 5. Birdhouse in Your Soul 6. She's an Angel 7. XTC vs. Adam Ant 8. Istanbul (Not Constantinople) 9. Ana Ng 10. First Kiss 11. Spider 12. Particle Man 13. She's Actual Size 14. S-E-X-X-Y 15. Meet James Ensor 16. Till My Head Falls Off 17. About Me 18. Planet Of The Apes (Hidden) 19. Return From The Planet Of The Apes (Hidden) 20. Conquest Of The Planet Of The Apes (Hidden) 21. Escape From The Planet Of The Apes (Hidden) 22. Battle For The Planet Of The Apes (Hidden) 23. Beneath The Planet Of The Apes (Hidden) 24. This Ape's For You (Hidden) 1. Doctor Worm My name is Dr. Worm. Good morning. How are you? I'm Dr. Worm. I'm interested in things. I'm not a real doctor, But I am a real worm; I am an actual worm. I live like a worm. I like to play the drums. I think I'm getting good, But I can handle criticism. I'll show you what I know, And you can tell me if you think I'm getting better on the drums. I'll leave the front un-locked 'cause I can't Hear the doorbell When I get into it I can't tell if you are Watching me twirling the stick. When I give the signal, my friend Rabbi Vole will pay the solo Some day somebody else besides me will Call me by my stage name, they will Call me Dr Worm. Good Morning how are you, I'm Dr Worm I'm interested in things. I'm not a real doctor, But I am a real worm; I am an actual worm. I live like a worm. I like to play the drums. I think I'm getting good, But I can handle criticism. I'll show you what I know, And you can tell me if you think I'm getting better on the drums. I'm not a real doctor, But they call me Dr. Worm. 2. Severe Tire Damage Theme [no lyrics] 3. They Got Lost Julie at the station says They'll be here any minute now But she's running out of records and her show is ending anyhow. They can hear her saying Their name on the car radio But the signal keeps fading out no matter which way They go. I heard They Might Be somewhere in this town They Might Be Giants got lost driving around John said to John, I think we make a left at the light There should be a big crinkle, assuming this map is right John looked over and said, Hey, no its not It's a crumpled up wrapper from the fast food that we got I heard They Might Be somewhere in this town They Might Be Giants got lost driving around Dan said to Hal, "I see somebody walking this way" So They rolled down the window and said, "Hello. Hey excuse me, hey" "Could you tell us where we are and the best way out of here" They could tell from his expression he had absolutely no idea I heard They Might Be somewhere near this town They Might Be Giants got lost driving around Driving around Driving around They're still driving around 4. Why Does the Sun Shine? The sun is a mass of incandescent gas A gigantic nuclear furnace Where hydrogen is built into helium At a temperature of millions of degrees The sun is hot, the sun is not A place where we could live But here on Earth there'd be no life Without the light it gives We need its light We need its heat The sunlight that we see The sunlight comes from our own sun's Atomic energy The sun is a mass of incandescent gas A gigantic nuclear furnace Where hydrogen is built into helium At a temperature of millions of degrees The sun is hot The sun is so hot that everything on it is a gas: Aluminum, copper, iron, and many others. The sun is large If the sun were hollow, a million Earths could fit inside. And yet, it is only a middle-sized star. The sun is far away About 93 million miles away, that's why it looks so small. But even when it's out of sight The sun shines night and day We need its heat We need its light The sunlight that we see The sunlight comes from our own sun's Atomic energy Scientists have found that the sun is a huge atom-smashing machine. The heat and light of the sun are caused by nuclear reactions between hydrogen, nitrogen, carbon, and helium. The sun is a mass of incandescent gas A gigantic nuclear furnace Where hydrogen is built into helium At a temperature of millions of degrees 5. Birdhouse in Your Soul I'm your only friend I'm not your only friend But I'm a little glowing friend But really I'm not actually your friend But I am Blue canary in the outlet by the light switch Who watches over you Make a little birdhouse in your soul Not to put too fine a point on it Say I'm the only bee in your bonnet Make a little birdhouse in your soul I have a secret to tell From my electrical well It's a simple message and I'm leaving out the whistles and bells So the room must listen to me Filibuster vigilantly My name is blue canary one note* spelled l-i-t-e My story's infinite Like the Longines Symphonette it doesn't rest Blue canary in the outlet by the light switch Who watches over you Make a little birdhouse in your soul Not to put too fine a point on it Say I'm the only bee in your bonnet Make a little birdhouse in your soul I'm your only friend I'm not your only friend But I'm a little glowing friend But really I'm not actually your friend But I am There's a picture opposite me Of my primitive ancestry Which stood on rocky shores and kept the beaches shipwreck free Though I respect that a lot I'd be fired if that were my job After killing Jason off and countless screaming Argonauts Bluebird of friendliness Like guardian angels its always near Blue canary in the outlet by the light switch Who watches over you Make a little birdhouse in your soul Not to put too fine a point on it Say I'm the only bee in your bonnet Make a little birdhouse in your soul (and while you're at it Keep the nightlight on inside the Birdhouse in your soul) Not to put too fine a point on it Say I'm the only bee in your bonnet Make a little birdhouse in your soul Blue canary in the outlet by the light switch (and while you're at it) Who watches over you (keep the nightlight on inside the) Make a little birdhouse in your soul (birdhouse in your soul) Not to put too fine a point on it Say I'm the only bee in your bonnet Make a little birdhouse in your soul Blue canary in the outlet by the light switch (and while you're at it) Who watches over you (keep the nightlight on inside the) Make a little birdhouse in your soul (birdhouse in your soul) Not to put too fine a point on it Say I'm the only bee in your bonnet Make a little birdhouse in your soul 6. She's an Angel I met someone at the dog show She was holding my left arm But everyone was acting normal so I tried to look nonchalant. We both said, "I really love you," The Shriners loaned us cars We raced up and down the sidewalk twenty thousand million times Why did they send her over anyone else? How should I react? These things happen to other people They don't happen at all, in fact When you're following an angel Does it mean you have to throw your body off a building? Somewhere they're meeting on a pinhead Calling you an angel, calling you the nicest things I heard they had a space program When they sing you can't hear, there's no air Sometimes I think I kind of like that and Other times I think I'm already there Gonna ask for my admission Gonna speak to the man in charge The secretary says he's on another line, Can I hold for a long, long time? I found out she's an angel I don't think she knows I know I'm worried that something might happen to me If anyone ever finds out Why, why did they send her over anyone else? How should I react? These things happen to other people They don't happen at all When you're following an angel Does it mean you have to throw your body off a building? Somewhere they're meeting on a pinhead Calling you an angel, calling you the nicest things I heard they had a space program When they sing you can't hear, there's no air Sometimes I think I kind of like that and Other times I think I'm already there When you're following an angel Does it mean you have to throw your body off a building? Somewhere they're meeting on a pinhead Calling you an angel, calling you the nicest things 7. XTC vs. Adam Ant XTC versus Adam Ant Content versus form Fighting for their place in rock and roll There is no right or wrong Just when you think it's finished With XTC on top Ant music, like a phoenix Flies back up the charts XTC versus Adam Ant Only one will survive Beatle-based pop versus new romantic History will decide XTC versus Adam Ant I can't tell you why Even the singer from Bow Wow Wow Can't make up her mind XTC versus Adam Ant Time is marching on XTC versus Adam Ant There is no right or wrong There is no right or wrong There is No right Or wrong 8. Istanbul (Not Constantinople) Istanbul was Constantinople Now it's Istanbul, not Constantinople Been a long time gone, Constantinople Now it's Turkish delight on a moonlit night Every gal in Constantinople Lives in Istanbul, not Constantinople So if you've a date in Constantinople She'll be waiting in Istanbul Even old New York was once New Amsterdam Why they changed it I can't say People just liked it better that way So take me back to Constantinople No, you can't go back to Constantinople Been a long time gone, Constantinople Why did Constantinople get the works? That's nobody's business but the Turks Istanbul (Istanbul) Istanbul (Istanbul) Even old New York was once New Amsterdam Why they changed it I can't say People just liked it better that way So take me back to Constantinople No, you can't go back to Constantinople Been a long time gone, Constantinople Why did Constantinople get the works? That's nobody's business but the Turks Istanbul 9. Ana Ng Make a hole with a gun perpendicular To the name of this town in a desk-top globe Exit wound in a foreign nation Showing the home of the one this was written for My apartment looks upside down from there Water spirals the wrong way out the sink And her voice is a backwards record It's like a whirlpool and it never ends Ana Ng and I are getting old And we still haven't walked in the glow of each other's majestic presence Listen Ana hear my words They're the ones you would think I would say if there was a me for you All alone at the '64 World's Fair Eighty dolls yelling "Small girl after all" Who was at the Dupont Pavilion? Why was the bench still warm? Who had been there? Or the time when the storm tangled up the wire To the horn on the pole at the bus depot And in the back of the edge of hearing These are the words the voice was repeating: Ana Ng and I are getting old And we still haven't walked in the glow of each other's majestic presence Listen Ana hear my words They're the ones you would think I would say if there was a me for you When I was driving once I saw this painted on a bridge: "I don't want the world, I just want your half" They don't need me here, and I know you're there (don't need me) Where the world goes by like the humid air (world goes by) And it sticks like a broken record Everything sticks like a broken record Everything sticks until it goes away (it goes home) And the truth is, we don't know anything (don't know) Ana Ng and I are getting old And we still haven't walked in the glow of each other's majestic presence Listen Ana hear my words They're the ones you would think I would say if there was a me for you Ana Ng and I are getting old And we still haven't walked in the glow of each other's majestic presence Listen Ana hear my words They're the ones you would think I would say if there was a me for you Ana Ng and I are getting old And we still haven't walked in the glow of each other's majestic presence Listen Ana hear my words They're the ones you would think I would say if there was a me for you 10. First Kiss The morning Alarm rings I'm asleep but she's talking to me She's walking 'round wearing all of my clothes But we decided long ago We'd build a time machine and go How 'bout another, first kiss kiss kiss yeah I want another first kiss Other women were to sentimental Always worrying about their hair Got tired of wasting all my time Now I'm not worrying at all How 'bout another, first kiss kiss kiss yeah I want another first kiss kiss kiss yeah I want another first kiss The clock [rings], She's waiting, I could tell you we belong together I could tell you you belong with me But we've run out of things to say And we'll be happy anyway, so How 'bout another first kiss kiss kiss yeah I want another first kiss kiss kiss yeah I want another first kiss 11. Spider Ladies and gentlemen Ladies and gentlemen Spider He is our hero Spider Get rid of Spider Step on spider Spider We love you spider I promise not to kill you Spider Spider We love you spider Spider Get rid of Spider Must stop Spider He is our hero 12. Particle Man Particle man, particle man Doing the things a particle can What's he like? It's not important Particle man Is he a dot, or is he a speck? When he's underwater does he get wet? Or does the water get him instead? Nobody knows, Particle man Triangle man, Triangle man Triangle man hates particle man They have a fight, Triangle wins Triangle man Universe man, Universe man Size of the entire universe man Usually kind to smaller men Universe man He's got a watch with a minute hand, Millenium hand and an eon hand When they meet it's a happy land Excellent man, universe man Person man, person man Hit on the head with a frying pan Lives his life in a garbage can Person man Is he depressed or is he a mess? Does he feel totally worthless? Who came up with person man? Degraded man, person man Triangle man, triangle man Triangle man hates person man They have a fight, triangle wins Triangle man 13. She's Actual Size Words fail Buildings tumble The ground opens wide Light beams down from heaven She stands before my eyes She's actual size, but she seems much bigger to me Squares may look distant in her rear view mirror but they're actual size Nationwide, believe Big men Often tremble As they step aside I thought I was big once She changed my mind She's actual size, but she seems much bigger to me. I've never known anybody like her, she's actual size As she drives away She's got All the money Money couldn't buy She's got something special That someone left behind She's actual size, but she seems much bigger to me Squares may look distant in her rear view mirror but they're actual size As she drives away Her face Hangs in portrait On the post office wall She's stuck in my heart now Where my blood belongs She's actual size, but she seems much bigger to me I've never known anybody like her, she's actual size Nationwide, believe Notes Here's the best guess so far about the lyrics to "Larger than Life." Please give input. I need help with all of the reggae lyrics! She's actual size, but she seems much bigger to me Words fail Buildings tumble The ground opens wide Light beams down from heaven She stands before my eyes She's actual size, but she seems much bigger to me Squares may look distant in her rear view mirror but they're actual size As she drives away Big men Often tremble As they step aside I thought I was big once She changed my mind She's actual size, but she seems much bigger to me I've never known anybody like her, she's actual size Nationwide, believe You think she's big, you think she's larger than life But if you open up your eyes you'll see she's actual size You think she's big, you think she's larger than life But if you open up your eyes you'll see she's actual In your mind you have her on a pedestal You admire her from afar like she's a china doll You need to realize Before you ???? So go ahead, approach the girl, it up to you ???? You think she's big, you think she's larger than life But if you open up your eyes you'll see she's actual size You think she's big, you think she's larger than life But if you open up your eyes you'll see she's actual She's got All the money Money couldn't buy She's got something special That someone left behind She's actual size, but she seems much bigger to me I've never known anybody like her, she's actual size Actual size, believe Words fail Buildings tumble Light beams down from heaven She's actual size, but she seems much bigger to me 14. S-E-X-X-Y Dressed only in clothes From her head to her toes This is the way The talking part goes S-E-X-X-Y More than enough Around the clock with nobody else S-E-X-X-Y There she is Standing on the bed Cookie in one hand, wig on her head S-E-X-X-Y X because it's extra baby Y because it's extra baby Unnoticed by few Very very few And that includes you Look inside your mind Look inside your eye Secret agent spy, come to see why S-E-X-X-Y One finger nail Across your back Baby's first gold tooth initials inscribed S-E-X-X-Y X because it's extra baby Y because it's extra baby You gotta understand She wants to be your man She's got another plan 15. Meet James Ensor Meet James Ensor Belgium's famous painter Dig him up and shake his hand Appreciate the man Before there were junk stores Before there was junk He lived with his mother and the torments of Christ The world was transformed A crowd gathered round Pressed against his window so they could be the first To meet James Ensor Belgium's famous painter Raise a glass and sit and stare Understand the man He lost all his friends He didn't need his friends He lived with his mother and repeated himself The world has forgotten The world moved along The crowd at his window went back to their homes Meet James Ensor Meet James Ensor Belgium's famous painter Dig him up and shake his hand Appreciate the man 16. Till My Head Falls Off There were 87 Advil in the bottle now there's 30 left I ate 47 so what happened to the other 10? Why do you suspiciously change the subject and break my concentration As I dump the bottle out and I count the Advil up again? Don't interrupt me as I struggle to complete this thought Have some respect for someone more forgetful than yourself And I'm not done And I won't be till my head falls off Hitting every pocket on my shirt, pants and overcoat And I'm hitting them again but I don't know where I put my notes Clearing my throat, and gripping the lectern I smile and face my audience Clearing his throat and smiling with his hands on the bathroom sink And when I lean my head against the frosted shower stall I see stuff through the glass that I don't recognize at all And I'm not done And I won't be till my head falls off Though it may not be a long way off I'm not done talking yet I'm not done talking yet And when I lean my head against the frosted shower stall I see a broken figure silhouetted on the wall And I'm not done And I won't be till my head falls off Though it may not be a long way off I won't be done until my head falls off 17. About Me [lyrics missing] 18. Planet Of The Apes (Hidden) In a world of simians I'm waiting for my thumbs On the Planet of the Apes this song is sung We're waiting for our thumbs We're waiting for our thumbs In the world of simians we're waiting for our thumbs One Two Three Four We're waiting for our thumbs 19. Return From The Planet Of The Apes (hidden) Cornellius Cornellius, I miss you ape I miss you ape I miss your toffee cape I miss your toffee cape, Cornellius, Cornellius, you were my favorite ape I've got to get back to that crazy planet that they call the planet of the apes and find Cornellius, my favorite ape I miss his toffee cape, I say toffee - some would just say tan but I'm a sophisticated guy so I call it toffee 20. Conquest Of The Planet Of The Apes (Hidden) Conquest, it's a type of quest They called it a conquest of the Planet of the Apes Conquest, they played it at request It was another type of quest For the Planet of the Apes Conquest! Request! We're gonna have an inquest but this is a type of quest For the planet of the Apes Yeah! 21. Escape From The Planet Of The Apes (Hidden) Escape from the Planet of the Apes Well we gotta escape from the Planet of the Apes 'Cause all our friends are on different planet Yes all my friends are on a different planet now Gotta escape from the Planet of the Apes Gotta escape from the Planet of the Apes I've got a starship that will take you to the planet where Mick Jagger lives We've gotta escape to the planet of the Apes We've gotta escape to the planet of the Apes before we explode. 22. Battle For The Planet Of The Apes (Hidden) (Crowd chants "people people people", and "ape ape ape" at the commands of the Johns.) 23. Beneath The Planet Of The Apes (Hidden) All my friends are beneath the Planet of the Apes All my friends are All my friends are All my friends are beneath the Planet of the Apes And when I get there I'll find my friends there Deep inside the ground Underneath the town Where the apes live Where the apes live You can't walk around Because it is in town All my friends are All my friends are Beneath the Planet Of the Apes 24. This Ape's For You (Hidden) This Ape's for you He's coming atcha This ape's for you He wants to love you [eof]